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Finding Questions to Help in Loss and Grief

I’ve been swimming in grief of losing my Mom and trying to carry on my daily responsibilities.

There isn’t always space to stop and reflect because lately my schedule has been full. I know I have to let grief have it’s way and not ignore what’s happening in my heart despite the busyness. I wanted a place to write down the deeper questions I am grappling with right now.

I created a page in my bullet journal entitled, questions to ponder and reflection. I am trying to capture the moments of God whispering to me in the pain as I am walking this new path.

Some of the sweet end of the bitter this year has been traveling with one of the sponsors, Redemption Press at the Women of Joy Tour. I am smack dab in the midst of having the opportunity to hear godly teachers and participate in rich worship while working at a job I love!

Bible teachers such as Lisa Harper, Sheila Walsh, Ann Voskamp, Babbie Mason, and others have been speaking truth into my fragile soul. The truth is a healing balm to my soul and God has met me in the promise of Psalm 34:18, that he is, “close to those who are broken-hearted and saves those crushed in spirit.”

This past Friday, in Branson, surrounded by 4200 worshipping women, we sang, It is Well with My Soul.

I said, “God I can’t do this, I am in the front row.”

This song has been a generational favorite of my grandmother’s and my Mom’s. I did what any woman does with roller coaster emotions.

I gallantly bowed my head and let the tears flow as I sang the phrase over and over again,

It is well, it is well with my soul.

Why? Because it is.

God meets us in our brokenness.

God comes to us in our hurting places.

God waits to embrace the mess and reassures us with his overwhelming love.

God met me in those five minutes of worship and rescued me.

He reached down in my lonely grief and gave me his outrageous grace of healing.

I realize I won’t always be in this space and I know I don’t have to have all the answers, but I can think about the questions that God puts before me.

Questions such as,

Am I motivated by my pain or passion to serve God? (Sheila Walsh)

Do I recognize my need for God in my desperation? (Lisa Harper)

Can I fathom that Jesus prays for me? (Babbie Mason)

If Christ bears scars, how can I despise my scars? (Ann Voskamp)

Grief softens the soil of our heart to receive truth in ways we might not have invited in the past. (Click to tweet)

I am recording my list of questions and thoughts asking God to speak to these questions in the loss.

What are you facing?

Do you have questions of truth that God is whispering to your wounded soul?

Write them down and make them a part of your conversation with God. He is waiting like the best friend you’ve ever had to give you comfort and peace in your storm.

 

 

Learn how you too can be anchored in the storm. www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored

Making Grief Your Friend

I boarded a plane two days after I learned my mother graduated to heaven.

I had an assignment.

For months, two monumental events were planned that took place this past week. Anchored: Leading Through the Storms was released with a book party at our local bookstore. The Women Of Joy Tour started, and I was heading to Tennessee where my cousin Andrea and I were featured authors with Redemption Press for our new devotional Live Bold, which was also making its debut.

The day after I received the news my Mom had passed, I wondered how I would garner the strength to finish the week. I was already hanging on by a thread. I was emotionally spent and had many restless nights anticipating the news of my Mom’s death. I know God doesn’t make mistakes and it is no accident that all these events converged.

I decided to forge ahead with the plans not because I was ignoring the grief in my heart or trying to be a super saint, but because I believed with everything I am that God was in the center of this storm.

It wasn’t a surprise. He knew before it even took place.

I believe he wasn’t inviting me to lie down in the boat. Rather, he was asking me to trust him with my fragile heart and hang onto the boat’s wheel, and he would help me navigate the wind and the waves of grief.

I chose to go into the weekend with grief as my companion and friend.

My greatest fear was that I wouldn’t be able to contain my emotions and it would impair my ability to function.

I sensed God whispering to me to surrender my roller coaster emotions and trust him. I wrestled with the many what if’s and doubts.

Gently, he reassured me this was his plan, and he would uphold me with his right hand. The songs my Mom loved such as the old hymns, In the Garden and It is Well with My Soul, flooded my mind as the weekend approached.

They gave me comfort and Psalm 11:15, Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his faithful servants was like a warm blanket covering my soul.

The day we left I woke up with a renewed sense of strength. I felt carried close in God’s arms, and I was able to choose joy in the midst of my grief.

I allowed grief to become my friend by not shutting it out.

Grief met me in the songs the worship leader, Babbie Mason sang and reminded me that my Mom is praising Jesus and is whole and free.

Grief led me to see the truth in God’s word as the speakers spoke the truth that Jesus prays for me, loves me, and extends mercy and grace in the midst of grief.

Grief extended love to me through the prayers of strangers and kind words from new friends.

Grief allowed me to empathize and enter into other’s pain and pray for healing and restoration.

Grief leads me to Jesus because he understands every runaway emotion I experience and allows me the space to rest even when I can’t make sense of my thoughts and feelings. (click to tweet)

Grief encourages me to claim Jesus as my anchor because he understands what I can’t fully understand.

I am holding on to everything I know to be true about my God because he is the best captain of the boat in the storm of grief.

Find out more about being anchored in the storm. www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored