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slow down

5 Ways to Practice “Being”

The past few weeks I’ve been teaching my international students at the university the practice of “being” and not “doing” when it comes to leadership. Why is this so difficult for us? We want to know what the next steps are and yet sometimes we aren’t willing to pay the price to “be” instead of “do.”

We’ve bought into the lie that if we keep doing MORE things then we will be able to discern the next best decision and avoid making the wrong turn on our life path.  (click to tweet)

If you joined me on Wednesday night for the weekly Facebook Live in the Live Bold Series Group, I shared the many reasons why I love peering into the lives of bold women in history. Amy Carmichael, Emma Dryer, Hannah Whitall Smith, and Mrs. Oswald Chambers to name a few. They have a common thread of walking out their faith. There is a theme of learning what it means to sit in God’s presence and to be still that accompanies their “doing.”

Each of these women faced unexpected challenges and yet they kept their hearts and minds fixed on Jesus (Psalm 57:7).

Bold Women

Amy Carmichael challenges, If we wait till we have clear enough vision to see the expected end before we stay our mind upon Him who is our strength, we shall miss an opportunity that will never come again. Now is the time to say, My heart is fixed, O God, my heart is fixed: I will sing and give praise. (Psalm 57:7), even though as we say the words there is no sense of exultation. 

Their vision was not dependant on clarity and certainty. It was dependant on God by waiting, listening, and taking steps of faith as they heard God whisper to move ahead. They “stayed their mind” on Jesus. They learned what it meant “to be.” Amy challenges us to keep our minds focused which in turn influences our behavior.

I don’t know about you, but when I am feeling anxious about a situation or a decision I need to make, I need some tools to help me “stay my mind” on Christ.

Here are five ways to practice “being” so you can stay your mind on Jesus.

1. Worship music:

Fill your day with praises to God and watch your anxiety melt away by refocusing your thoughts on the praises of God.

2. Pray:

Move out of your ordinary routine to pray. Take a walk and release all your thoughts to God and then take some time to walk and just listen. Take a drive and park at the beach, park, or a place of God’s creation you admire. Pray for 5 minutes. Listen for 5 minutes, and then pray for another 5 minutes.

3. Read a passage of the Psalms:

Read and look at the pattern of David’s prayers. He was authentic and yet always brought it back to focusing on what God could do and who He is. Speak it out loud. Here are a few to get you started: Psalm 42, Psalm 91, Psalm 37.

4. Write your own Psalm:

In a journal record what you are facing or the decision you need to make. Turn the last part of your writing into praises of confession believing that God:
is for you,
will provide, and that
He loves you no matter what.

5. Serve others:

Purposefully plan to do something to serve someone else who is in need. Whether making a meal for a neighbor, write a note of encouragement, or drive someone to the doctor. Focusing on helping others can keep our mind stayed on Jesus.

These are not new ideas. Being intentional about the simple basics and practicing “being” can bring a fresh perspective.

Excerpt from: A Very Present Help by Judith Couchman, 1996 Servant Publications.)

The Solution for Resolutions in 2019

We are past the halfway mark in January and I have one question to ask. How are you doing on the goals and resolutions you may have decided on January 1st? If you are anything like me, I get about 10 days into it and then I completely and utterly fail. I feel guilty and determine to start again, only to find myself giving up before I am even into the second month. Do I hear any takers out there? Am I all alone on this?

The beginning of the year is often is a chance to reflect and make some changes and many of us chart out goals and resolutions but let me tell you why I prefer to choose “one word” rather than make resolutions because resolutions don’t seem to work for me.

I don’t know who started the trend but choosing a “one word” has caught on like fire and it has given purpose and direction for those of us who have abandoned the resolution making. Facebook and Twitter are strewn with others sharing their chosen word for the year and it is inspiring to read.

Choosing one word for me has been about “being” rather than “doing.”

When I make resolutions it becomes more about doing than creating a momentum of the purpose of who I hope to be. I’ve been a human doing rather than a human being more than I’d like to admit.

My one word has become not just a theme for the year but also a pilgrimage. God has surprised me many times as I’ve watched the word we’ve chosen together come to life and intersect with my journey.

You might be thinking, how do I choose just “one word” for the year?

Authors Mike Ashcraft & Rachel Olsen, authors of the book My One Word: Change Your Life With Just One Word give three simple steps which I encourage you to review. This will help you get started.

In brief, this what Mike and Rachel said:

Step One

Determine the kind of person you want to become…
The first step is to simply take some time and decide what kind of person you want to be at the end of this year. 

Step Two

Identify the characteristics of that person
Get a picture of that person and then simply identify their major characteristics. What are the qualities of the person you want to become?

Step Three

Pick a word
Once you have a list of the characteristics, simply pick a word. There might be fifteen things that you want to change, but you must resist the temptation to promise you will do them all. Instead, simply commit to ONE WORD.
(more info on the authors and their book: www.myoneword.org)

As I approach each year, I add two more elements to the above steps that the authors suggest.

PRAY and choose a SCRIPTURE.

Ask God to reveal a word to you and a verse to reflect on throughout the year.

Remember, choosing a word is not meant to be forced. Ask God what kind of person he is asking you to be in 2019. Be ready to receive your “one word” from him and embrace it.

I have a freebie you can download, LiveBoldOneWordWorksheet. This is the same worksheet that I shared in the Live Bold Series Community a few weeks ago and is a combo of things I’ve learned along the way.  Chances are some of you still might be thinking about what you’d like to do for 2019. And I hope it is an encouragement to you.

I am now ready for my big “one word” reveal for 2019.

Drumroll…

This year God whispered to me sometime in mid-December the word,

RECAPTURE

As I worked and prayed through the steps above, the word settled and resonated that this is to be my word for 2019.  I will be sharing more later on this, but for now, I am embracing this word wholeheartedly and trusting God to drive the meaning further into my soul.

Please don’t feel because we are rolling into the 3rd week of January that you’ve failed because you don’t have your “one word” just yet if this has been a practice. Some years I have it right at the beginning of the year and others it has come in January. The point is, relax, ask God, pray and trust him to speak to you.

Be sure and check out the book, My One Word: Change Your Life With Just One Word for greater depth and insight into crafting your original “one word.”

I’d love to hear your “one word” in the comments or pop on over to our Live Bold Series Group on Facebook and join in on the discussion.

How The Grinch Saved My Christmas

I was at the movie theater last week surrounded by kids of all ages. Jason and Brittany (my youngest son), and little Lucy who is three invited me to go and see the new Grinch Movie. It was so much fun to see the movie through her eyes and the giggles and laughter of children seated all around me.

The story of the Grinch is simple.

He hates Christmas.

Passionately.

He devises a plan to rob the joy of Christmas by stealing everything that represents Christmas from the “Who’s” in “Whoville.”

You remember the story…He took away everything, trees, presents, food, every last scrap of tinsel and it didn’t seem to change anything.

The joy remained in the hearts of the “Who’s” in “Whoville.”

His plan failed because in the process of trying to steal Christmas something happened to his heart.  He is utterly baffled and yet he is transformed and Christmas is saved enlarging his heart.

He remarks at the end of the movie as he is feasting with his new friends,

I stole Christmas because I thought it would fix something that happened a long time ago.

A tear slipped down my cheek as I heard this statement. Yes, it is a movie, and it is a cartoon for crying out loud! But I realized how true the statement is; I stole Christmas because I thought it would fix something that happened a long time ago.

Christmas can be a painful time for many people, and I have had my struggles of grief this Christmas. I love Christmas! However, this year has a challenging twist as I’ve had to ask God to help me make a choice not to let the sadness and grief overtake the joy.

Losing my Mom makes Christmas much more difficult. Our relationship was complicated at best, and my hope was always that it could be better. Christmas heightens all the emotions because Christmas marks what happened exactly a year ago when we found out she was sick.

Maybe you are reading this right now, and you can’t wait for Christmas to be over because it is a reminder of something that happened just recently or a long time ago. You are hoping it will fix the uncomfortable feelings by blowing past the holidays.

If you could, maybe you’d like to steal everything about Christmas and dump it like the Grinch wanted to so you don’t have to be reminded of something hurtful, painful, or sad.

Just like the story of the Grinch, everything about Christmas could be stripped away, and the simple reminder of what God did for you and me is still there. The little baby in the manger is the miracle that can transform our pain and sorrow into joy. It is the only true fix.

No matter how hard we try to forget, Jesus is Immanuel, which means, “God with us.” He is our comfort and joy as the lyrics state in the Christmas Carol.

Jesus is the only one who can save Christmas for both you and me. He is the only one that can heal our past hurts and fix it so we can experience his peace.  He is the only one that can make our hearts bigger to create room for his presence.

I’m with you friend. Sitting in the grief, sadness, and disappointment in front of the manger and believing God will help your heart this Christmas.

Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. Luke 2:10,11

 

 

The Reality of Christmas: Choosing Joy Over Chaos

The kick-off has begun, and I am not talking about football! Although we’ve been watching lots of football at our house lately.

Christmas is just around the corner and how are we going to keep our joy and not freak out with all we have on our list? How can we worship Jesus every day in the middle of the Christmas rush?

If you are following me with my cousin Andrea in our Live Bold Series FB Group you would notice that we’ve offered  a free resource exclusive to our Live Bold Subscribers called, The Reality of Christmas: Choosing Joy over Chaos. I’m offering this to you too!

This is the first week of advent and the season of advent has long been a tradition in the Christian Calendar. Advent means, “coming” or “arrival” in Latin. I wanted to give you this Christmas gift early because I can’t wait to share it with you!

I am excited to offer, Reality of Christmas: Choosing Joy Over Chaos which is a free printable download designed to encourage your devotions this Christmas season. This is graciously made possible by Crossroads Church which happens to be where Cynthia’s son, Jordan and his wife Julie, are pastors.

I want to help you (because I need this too!) this Christmas to stay focused and fuel your faith in worship and reflect on the greatest gift ever given—Jesus Christ.

You’ve heard me share that I am a recovering perfectionist. It’s so easy to fall into the trap of thinking I have to provide the “perfect Christmas” for my family. If we are not intentional about getting our hearts ready for Christmas, we will fall into the trap of getting caught up in our to-do lists and shove Jesus out of the manger!

Will you join me for Reality of Christmas: Choosing Joy Over Chaos? It is four weeks and each week features scripture reading with reflection questions, activities you can choose to encourage you during the season, and a variety of family activities you can use with your kids and grandkids.

I’d also like to invite you to join me and my cousin Andrea as we will be hosting a FB Live each week on Wednesdays that reflects the week theme of bible reading and activities. We will also have some fun surprises along the way, because I love celebrations. The first video happened today and you can watch the replay. Just request to join the Live Bold Series FB Group to be inspired by the community of women choosing to Live Bold for Jesus!

Stay tuned and in the meantime download your Reality of Christmas: Choosing Joy Over Chaos copy and have it handy next to your bible.

Christmas Gift Ideas  and they are ON SALE!

Anchored: Leading Through the Storms – great gift to encourage the leader (pastor, small group leader, etc.) in your life. $8.89 reg.price $14.99

Order direct from newhopepublishers.com or amazon.com

Live Bold: A Devotional Journal to Strengthen Your Soul –  wonderful gift for those who love to journal and want to learn to live bold for Jesus. $16.99

To order: redemption-press.com/shop/livebold or contact [email protected]

Live Unveiled: Freedom to Worship God, Love Others and Tell Your Story. 10-week bible study. This bible study expertly guides you to embrace the freedom you’ve been longing for through the powerful study of scripture and authentic stories. $8.02 reg. price 17.99

To order: amazon.com or

Unlocked: 5 Myths Holding Your Influence Captive – a book for women who are aspiring and seasoned leaders desiring to leverage their influence. $9.52 reg. $14.99

To order: amazon.com

 

When You Sense Your Anxiety Meter Rising

On a flight coming home from Nashville a few weeks ago, I found myself stuck in the airplane bathroom. I tugged and pulled at the folding door. I panicked. I yelled and banged on the door to which the flight attendant on the other side said, Just a minute and I will let you out.

After I was safely outside, she quietly told me so the crowd standing near me couldn’t hear that I needed to unlock the door.

How embarrassing!

How could I not know the tiny little truth of sliding the lock the opposite way? Well, it was early morning, and I hadn’t had my strong cup of tea just yet, that’s my excuse!

After a good laugh with my hubby, I realized the assumption is the door was unlocked, but I still felt stuck. Anxiety swarmed all over me at the moment, and I couldn’t even think straight.

The truth is, I wasn’t trapped, I thought I was.

Here is the dilemma many of us face. We just turned the calendar page to November, and I wonder how many of us sense the anxiety meter rising.

We feel trapped by expectations and stuck with fears of unmet expectations only to find ourselves robbed of peace and joy.

The temptation is for us to get all tied up in knots of what we think we have to do and be this time of year.

Good news!

There is a solution, and it is right in front of us.

Gratitude.

Ann Voskamp says, “The answer to deep anxiety is the deep adoration of God.” (click to tweet)

This includes the practice of gratitude.

Gratitude takes the focus off of ourselves and places it on God.

Ever wonder why Thanksgiving precedes Christmas? It’s the training ground to get our hearts ready for Advent to receive the joy of Christmas.  (click to tweet)

Because I sense my anxiety escalating already, I’ve created a journey  21 Days of Gratitude and Prayer and I am inviting you to join me.

If you’ve been following me on FB and Instagram the past several months, you know that it’s been a crazy and beautiful year of travel with my cousin, Andrea Tomassi, the co-author of  Live Bold: A Devotional Journal to Strengthen Your Soul.

We have a FB Group Live Bold Series, and we’d love you to come along and walk this 21 Days of Gratitude with us. Together, I bet we will find encouragement as we practice gratitude.

Let’s determine to capture pure joy and escape the madness in our minds of the holiday season.

Here’s how to join the 21 Days of Gratitude and Prayer journey:

Download your FREE PDF 21DaysofGratitude2018 that starts this week on Wednesday.

Each day has a daily promise to prompt reflection on the truth of gratitude and then a place to write a brief sentence of thanksgiving.

I’ve also included some other suggestions on how to expand the gratitude journey and engage as much as you like. We will be sharing along the way in the FB Group, so invite a friend and come along!

Lastly, request to join the FB Live Bold Series Group and become a part of the Live Bold community.

I hope to see you there!

Cynthia

 

 

 

 

 

When You Are Living Two Weeks Behind

Ever feel like you are living two weeks behind schedule?

Hard to catch-up?

Take a breath?

I love summer and usually I find it is a season to push the reset button.

I’ve been waiting for a few weeks now to do just that–regroup, reset, renew, refresh and all the rest of the “re” words that define rest. And yet, I feel as though I am two weeks behind hitting reset because I’m still running. Read more

Finding Questions to Help in Loss and Grief

I’ve been swimming in grief of losing my Mom and trying to carry on my daily responsibilities.

There isn’t always space to stop and reflect because lately my schedule has been full. I know I have to let grief have it’s way and not ignore what’s happening in my heart despite the busyness. I wanted a place to write down the deeper questions I am grappling with right now.

I created a page in my bullet journal entitled, questions to ponder and reflection. I am trying to capture the moments of God whispering to me in the pain as I am walking this new path.

Some of the sweet end of the bitter this year has been traveling with one of the sponsors, Redemption Press at the Women of Joy Tour. I am smack dab in the midst of having the opportunity to hear godly teachers and participate in rich worship while working at a job I love!

Bible teachers such as Lisa Harper, Sheila Walsh, Ann Voskamp, Babbie Mason, and others have been speaking truth into my fragile soul. The truth is a healing balm to my soul and God has met me in the promise of Psalm 34:18, that he is, “close to those who are broken-hearted and saves those crushed in spirit.”

This past Friday, in Branson, surrounded by 4200 worshipping women, we sang, It is Well with My Soul.

I said, “God I can’t do this, I am in the front row.”

This song has been a generational favorite of my grandmother’s and my Mom’s. I did what any woman does with roller coaster emotions.

I gallantly bowed my head and let the tears flow as I sang the phrase over and over again,

It is well, it is well with my soul.

Why? Because it is.

God meets us in our brokenness.

God comes to us in our hurting places.

God waits to embrace the mess and reassures us with his overwhelming love.

God met me in those five minutes of worship and rescued me.

He reached down in my lonely grief and gave me his outrageous grace of healing.

I realize I won’t always be in this space and I know I don’t have to have all the answers, but I can think about the questions that God puts before me.

Questions such as,

Am I motivated by my pain or passion to serve God? (Sheila Walsh)

Do I recognize my need for God in my desperation? (Lisa Harper)

Can I fathom that Jesus prays for me? (Babbie Mason)

If Christ bears scars, how can I despise my scars? (Ann Voskamp)

Grief softens the soil of our heart to receive truth in ways we might not have invited in the past. (Click to tweet)

I am recording my list of questions and thoughts asking God to speak to these questions in the loss.

What are you facing?

Do you have questions of truth that God is whispering to your wounded soul?

Write them down and make them a part of your conversation with God. He is waiting like the best friend you’ve ever had to give you comfort and peace in your storm.

 

 

Learn how you too can be anchored in the storm. www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored

The Joy and Sadness of Writing

I’ve been a writer since I was in 3rd grade and wrote my first book Irene and the Big Balloon. I even illustrated it myself. It was a single copy meant to engage an exclusive audience of two…my parents!

They fostered the creativity by buying me a red gold leaf edged diary with a lock and key. I would wander off to my secret place on the side of the wooded hill in the back of our house and write. I dreamed of writing a book someday that would go beyond the confines of my little world to impact others.

I am incredibly grateful that this dream has been realized more than once Anchored: Leading Through the Storms is being released today. It is an exciting time planned with a book launch at my local bookstore and other events over the next weeks and months.

And yet the excitement is mingled with a sense of sadness.

My Mom is moments away from entering into heaven and today is possibly the day.

God isn’t surprised and he knew the contents of this book and the converging of these events.

A few months back when we first learned of my Mom’s cancer, I was rereading the first few chapters of the book before I went to sleep. The tears rolled down my cheeks as God encouraged me through the story of the disciples on the lake with Jesus in Mark 4. I might add, IN MY OWN BOOK!

That’s what happens sometimes, as an author. You write a book not just for an audience of readers, but write it for yourself because it is a part of the big picture story that God is writing in you and me.

I said goodbye to my Mom a little over 10 days ago. I had the chance to read her a few chapters and she encouraged me just as she did in the 3rd grade.

“This is really good, and I can tell it comes from the heart.”

Her words meant everything to me in that moment. I read to her the story of Job and the anchors he placed in his life before his catastrophic storm hit when he lost everything. The anchors held him steadfast as he walked through a valley of immense suffering.

My Mom, like Job has cultivated her strong anchors to face the storm of this insidious illness. She confessed in her suffering that she knows God is present and holding her close. She sang with us her favorites in her weak condition holding onto her assurance of hope that she will soon be pain-free and with her Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ.

I am grateful for the legacy of faith my Mom taught me, that even now as we let her go, I find myself anchored in Jesus in this difficult storm of loss.

One anchor I am holding onto is…

By his divine power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life. 2 Peter 1:3  (click to tweet)

This is what I hope the reader will find between the pages of my new book. Hope and encouragement from God’s Word and anchors to help  stand strong in the midst of a storm.

Find out more about being anchored in the storm.

www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored

Special Purchase on PUB DAY WEEK

https://www.newhopepublishers.com/shop/anchored/

 

 

 

Living in Uncertainty

One of the things I love about being a life coach is helping people clarify their purpose and find their stride. Most of us, if not all of us, find several times throughout our lives of living in uncertainty. Change can be disconcerting and even frightening. But instead of dreading change we can see it as a window of time that provides a chance to see the broader landscape. It is often in these moments God moves us further onto His agenda.

When life is sure, the temptation is to get too comfortable. We are creatures of habit, and we like our routines. It works after all, so why break the cycle?

Living wholly surrendered to God means our lives are not our own. We give the Creator of the universe permission to mix things up and move things around even if it means taking us out of our comfort zones.

The undoing of a leader is thinking uncertainty is the enemy. (click to tweet) Rather I find uncertainty is a God opportunity to help shift us to the next level of leadership and more accurately into the next level of character He is building in us.

Living in uncertainty can be like watching a cyclone off in the distance. We see those winds circling and wonder how they will impact us. We aren’t sure how and where the storm will hit.

It is in the waiting with God where we find peace in the eye and center of the storm.  (click to tweet)

When I work with leaders who are facing transition I often take them through a basic process on purpose. Why? Because it is good to revisit who we are and where we see God in our lives and assess our experiences and abilities. I call it the “What do I know to be true about me?” exercise.

I help them evaluate their values, strengths, and weaknesses and create or revisit their mission statement. Staying true to who you know you are in Jesus helps you not fear the uncertainty of the winds even if they are within striking distance and feel too close for comfort.

There are things that happen as a result of uncertainty.

Sometimes we doubt our calling.

We question whether or not we heard God right.

We wrestle.

We ask questions.

We flip back and forth analyzing our life and experiences.

Is that a bad thing? I don’t think so. Thinking critically in a time of uncertainty and using discernment is wisdom. If you find yourself in a place of uncertainty, ask the hard questions.

Why am I doing what I am doing?

Have I experienced any defining moments of affirmation along the way?

Am I focused on my primary gifts for maximum impact?

Ask others around you; find people in your life who will let you ask the hard questions and not just tell you what you want to hear. (click to tweet)

Other times we see uncertainty as the end of something we thought was good. But change or the end of one assignment doesn’t necessarily mean there is not goodness ahead.

Remember, God is good all of the time, not only when things are going well, ministry is soaring, and you see incredible results.

God is good in the valleys.

God is good in the crisis.

God is good in the uncertainty . . . all of the time. (click to tweet)

I challenge you to think of uncertainty as an opportunity to bring closure to a chapter in a book while anticipating a new chapter ahead.

God is the one writing your story, and he often writes our story in chapters. There is, however, a measure of mystery, as Paul David Tripp writes in his book, New Morning Mercies,

There will always be a mystery in your life. God will always surprise you with what he brings your way. You will always be con-fronted with the unplanned and the unexpected.  All of this is because you don’t rule your life and you don’t write your own story.

Start anticipating. I dare you to embrace uncertainty. Watch for the surprises God has for you and worship in wonder as you wait.

 

Excerpt from Anchored: Leading in the Storms

Find out more about being anchored in the storm.

www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored

All rights reserved. Copyright 2018

Thinking Clearly in a Storm

I am an overachiever, overworker, overperfectionist, and overthinker. These dysfunctions in my life have come as a result of analyzing too much and not taking my thoughts and filtering them through God’s Word and direction.

I’ve had to work hard to retrain my brain so when I am in a storm, I can make a choice to confess my faith in a way that leverages my ability to see God and rise above my circumstances.

It has been a long, arduous journey, but to date, my faith is rooted deeper.

I live in Psalm 1:2–3:

“His delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.”

My prayer is that I will be planted deep in Jesus by the river so when the floodwaters rise I will not only survive, but I will flourish and thrive.

The more I practice detoxing my thinking and focusing on God’s Word the more I can rise above the obstacles. (click to tweet)

I move from being paralyzed, stuck on the riverbank watching the hopelessness of a rushing river, to a place of confident faith.

I have come to understand a few things about my thoughts.

First, my thoughts are real, and they are a result of what I observe, feel, and experience.

I can’t dismiss them and simply wish them away.

I must deal with recurring negative thoughts or they will deal with me.(click to tweet)

I need to, as Dr. Leaf says, “replace it with the correct information.”

Taking the random thought and vetting it through Philippians 4:8 is a good place to start.

 

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

And we can’t forget verse nine, “What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

Want peace from toxic thoughts? The only way to achieve the God kind of peace in a storm, is to filter our thoughts through his Word.

Excerpt from Anchored: Leading Through the Storms

All rights reserved. Copyright 2018

Find out more about being anchored in the storm.

www.cynthiacavanaugh.com/anchored